“Global harmony is only the reflection of humankind's internal harmony.”
~Abhijit Naskar, Fabric of Humanity
St. John the Divine. New York City
There is no doubt, great merit is sitting quietly following all the instructions of posture and breath that are given in all the religious traditions. Doing a daily practice is important in teaching discipline, in an undisciplined world. Routine and rituals of discipline need to then be extended to the external world of action too. If you are able to sit for 10 minutes every morning, then perhaps you are able to also make your bed regularly, do your laundry, fold and pack it away regularly, and so on. If this is not occurring, then clearly your sitting practice is not resulting in any results. Why do I say that? Because if you are not living a disciplined life in action, then clearly you are not examining the fears, resistance, hurt, shame, pain and issues that are getting in the way of doing so.
For example, if you resist making your bed every morning, turning the eye inward in meditative practice means asking the question “Why?”
The Past Memory of Experience
Do you have anger towards your mother for shaming you into tasks as a child? And so, are you triggered into shame as soon as you wake up? Are you currently avoiding the task to avoid the anger and shame you felt as a child?
Were you spoiled by your mother and never had to do anything and now have an attitude of self- entitlement? Does this extend to dependency issues in relationships? How did you feel deprived as a child of being able to feel a sense of confidence and self efficacy through encouragement to reach developmental milestones of doing things for yourself? What shame do you feel underneath this?
The Present Condition of Defense
What defenses are you using?
Do you just not notice the disarray of your life? You have settled for it, in a rut of denial and disinterest. Have you given up and tried to learn “to accept,” what feels uncomfortable? Are you telling yourself you are not uncomfortable with this situation?Are you constantly berating and shaming yourself and repeating your mother’s nagging?
Are you dismissing this example as ridiculous – that this is not an important issue of life?
Are you wanting to say, “What’s the big deal? There are just some things people don’t like to do.” Are you saying, “I have more important issues to deal with?”
Are you feeling shame reading this and making a commitment to doing this one task “right,” from now on? In other words, make yourself presentable and acceptable to the opinions of others.
Are you dismissing, arguing, rationalizing, justifying, denying, minimizing, staying on the surface, judging, criticizing? If you are, then just this discussion is arousing shame. It needs to be examined.
People will resist meditation if they enter into truly seeing themselves and their motives, and are unable to bring a deeply open, loving and understanding heart to the condition of shame and how it arose.
The future goal for which to strive
Notice the habitual and repetitive patterns of your life that do not point to an orderly and disciplined life that feels aesthetically pleasing, physically comfortable and inspiring of self integrity and inner confidence. Consider this example in the emotional realm – do you have a messy emotional life of judging, gossiping, shaming, criticizing, self-pity? Do you have a messy relational life – do you do for others, instead of yourself, are relationships difficult, distant or conflictual? Taking a simple example, like making your bed, and extending it to all realms is essential.
Examine deeply the underlying pattern and SEE where and how it originated. This is essential if your life purpose is to BECOME AWARE. Meditation is about becoming aware of what IS. It is about knowing yourself fully – the good, the bad and the ugly. You cannot stably attain higher states of consciousness unless you have integrated everything through your loving witness presence to all experience of your life, within and without. Which bring us to the most important aspect of meditation.
Find the mature and loving presence to be able to tolerate the pain and defenses you have been using.
If all you can do is bring judgment and shame to yourself, then you are still not seeing clearly how this issue arose in the first place and the defenses have not cracked around the heart. It is still encased in defenses. Notice this too, without judging it.
Meditation is not about changing behavior or attaining higher states of consciousness. It IS about becoming aware, with humility, love, presence, acceptance and discipline, of every aspect of your inner world. When you do this, it might happen quite naturally that the outer behaviors start to match the inner state, and that the love you bring to the lowest and deepest most painful of your aspects, starts matching the Love that is the Universal State of Love.
There is no skipping stages, or states. Every single dark part of your life has to be brought to the loving presence of your own being. The Loving God within must embrace and accept every last, lost aspect of the wounded god within. Only then will you be in alignment with the Truth and Love of Consciousness itself.
Do not attempt to by-pass this work – if you do, whatever higher states you attain will be ephemeral, fleeting and useless to your life. Spiritual by-pass results in a split and broken human being – and it is prevalent and pervasive in society.
“Turn you eye inward, whether sitting in meditation or living your life, meditatively.”
P.S. In using the “making the bed,” example, the exact opposite may be true. You might rigidly and obsessively make your bed and tidy up with great anxiety and distress if it is does not get done. The other side of the duality of chaotic is rigidity and the same practice as above applies.
“Being free of duality results in FLOW”